Another Thursday

No, I did not skip class last week as I SOOOOO wanted to. I had big commitments for last class, like getting a paper written and handed in (even if it was 4 hours too late and a few pages short). I did have a crazy day though, last week. I drove in Toronto for the first time and, as expected for a first timer, I got lost, stuck in traffic and came to class 2 hours late!! I got there though and got the paper in. After class I drove to the airport and picked up Sarah's fiance, Nate. What an awesome week it has been since then. Looking back I would say that I was burning myself out with my schedule, work, and school. I didn't go back to work until yesterday and then back to school today so life did slow down. I'm looking forward to getting into a regular schedule from now on, though.
I slept in this morning and so the Toronto map that I bought last week came in handy as I drove to school again today. This time I was only 30 min. late but it was fine since I was able to slip quietly into our discussion group. I drove to Redeemer after class to meet up with mom since she's at the teachers conference here. So I'm here at Redeemer's library today taking care of business while mom is at a seminar. It's good to see her and get a hug again. We don't often get alone time.
I think I stamped presence in class today as a talker... and maybe a controversial one. I don't really know what the class thought of what I was saying but I know that the professor and I didn't see eye to eye. The problem is, I didn't get much time to think about it and really know what I was going to say.... I just knew that It didn't sound right to me and that I had to say something. Here, let me set it up for you. (note: this might be confusing so feel free to skip this part) :

• The prof was talking about the Self and where sin comes into the picture. We were given a diagram to explore the person with and it looks something like a circle target. It has about 3 circles getting larger and larger. So there is the outer defense system, the inner defense system and the central core of the person, like the soul.
• So the prof. discusses different views on sin. Some people say that we are born good and slowly learn sin and evil. Some say that we have sin as part of our nature.
• The prof brings up passages of the Bible that say that the person is sinful by nature and is lost without God. So far, I do not have any problems with this. My problem comes when he applies this to the diagram. He says there are two types of people. The regenerate (I'm assuming he means non-Christian) and the unregenerate (Christian).
• Here is the diagram of the unregenerate: Picture a fried egg on the diagram of circles. Prof. said that the core, just that small circle, is where sin comes from. It is our inner most person that is full of sin and it is from the inside that sin slowly seeps its way through the person. I had a really hard time understanding this issue and so I put up my hand. I said that I don't believe that it is only the core that is completely sinful. Is he saying that there are some parts of us that are good (through conscience, good parenting, culture etc.)? He said, yes, the core is sinful and there are parts of us that are good, otherwise we would all be going out into the streets killing eachother. I must have looked really skepticle because he asked what I thought. I say that I think it is our whole being that is steeped in sin but that we are also made good. God created us in His image, no? I think we find God within us, don't we? I think this is a whole area of revelation... through the heart. But then, this is the unChristian person. I still think that we can find God in the unChristian. I just don't agree with this mans idea of sin. There are just way too many holes in it.
• Next he gives the diagram of the regenerate: Now picture the fried egg but the inside is white. Once we become Christians, the holy spirit works in our hearts to redirect them towards God. So I ask, where does sin come from now then? Oh, well.... it comes from past habits, past sin, choices that the outer self still makes. This just totally baffles me. I talked too much already so I shut my mouth and let the class continue but it was obvious that I had more to say.
• Another woman in the class was interested in what I said and challenged me a few other times but I couldn't really hear her. I know at one point she asked me a question that I can't really remember. I think it was something about the sin of Christians and how it's different from nonChristians. I'm sitting at the back of the class so everyone has turned around to talk to me and I know that my answer is the "wrong" answer so I squirmed until someone said... "go ahead, you're with friends". I said that I didn't think there was a difference. We are all in need of grace.

Some of those points up there didn't really have a point they are just things that have happened. Like I said earlier, I didn't have much time to reflect on what I was going to say so maybe I said things wrong but what do you think? I was really surprised by the difference in theology. I guess that's what happens when you are in one community for so much of your life. I want to hear what you guys think. Maybe I didn't really explain myself that well so you don't know what I'm talking about but if you do, tell me what you think.

I'm looking forward to a normal schedule for the next couple of weeks. Probably lots of work but hopefully more time for myself. My goal is to make a few batches of yogurt, some bread (hints and advice on this are welcome since i don't have a breadmaker) and figure out how to keep the mice out of the chicken coop. Oh, and spend some time with Dan. That's always a good thing.

Thanks for reading!!

Encouragement

I had such a wonderful two hours of my life yesterday. Life has been crazy lately with schedules, life changes (going to a new school and commuting), working. Plus I've been doing a lot of thinking about what I am doing in my life... you know those kinds of questions.
Dan has been REALLY good with it all. I feel very lucky to have this kind of husband. My dream of education and career is a huge investment in time, money and even in our relationship. It's hard. And he has never questioned it. I know that he can't feel exactly the way I do about school but he has never asked me to quit, rethink what I want or anything like that. In fact, he has encouraged me and reminded me of what I want, what I'm doing.
For this course I have had to meet with a counsellor and ask them their ideas on integrating Christianity and psychology. It seemed like a good time to meet up with Brenda (aka Prof. Stephenson) anyways so we got together for tea. I don't remember the last time that I have felt so righted and assured before this talk. She is such an encourager... and authentic about it too. She's a real gift to me.
I convinced Dan to drop me off at the bus station this morning at 6:00 instead of staying in Hamilton so that i could come home for the night. Getting up this early means that it's important to get to bed and asleep quickly but I was so filled up and excited about meeting with Brenda that i had to just pour it out. And instead of laying their saying "yah, uh huh, yup....", he got excited with me and just echoed everything I heard that morning. I'm a lucky woman.

Tyndale... again

I woke up at 5:15 and was on the bus (and almost asleep again) by 5:50. I got to Tyndale by 7:50... 40 min. early! How about that? I'm getting better at this. I don't know if I really want to start my day later b/c it was nice to be able to make myself a cup of tea and sit and finish reading a chapter for class yet. I am actually in class right now (yeah for wireless internet again).
Today will be an early day I think. I will go to the library, photocopy some articles and then head home ASAP. I have the urge to vacuum and cook... something healthy and creative. I like to take advantage of this feeling whenever it happens. :)
I am looking forward to this weekend. I work for a bit on Sat. morning but then I go home to my parents for a day of eating and drinking and relaxing and just hanging out together. I love those times. I'm sure we'll go for a walk and I hope we get some pictures too. Those are the fun pictures to look back on. This will be the last weekend like this till Christmas.

My friend Sarah is engaged!!

Sarah's engaged. She's been throuh a whirlwind of traveling and working and seeing friends and she's finally back home. After a year-long long distance relationship and then a month-long visit in Oregon with her boyfriend and his family, he proposed and sent her back home to Nova Scotia. She's coming here in two weeks for Hannelle's wedding with Nate (the fiance) so that we can meet him. I'm super excited. Congratulations Sarah. I've got a jar that I'm going to put all the twoonies I get for the next year into for the "going-to-Nova Scotia-for-Sarah's-wedding" fund.